dreams and irrationality

this morning I dreamt of you, and H and H. and they were trying to make you drunk. Before that they were trying to make the younger H drunk. it was pretty exciting, thinking back about it. We were all on this unexplainable high. Then vague recollections of a cab ride through the city lights […]

so much angst I wanna die

  it’s like always craving and wanting and yearning. the endlessness that we are caught in and never pulled from the wreckage of my silent reverie. /just need to read some angsty hanchul and cry it off. cause it’s so stuffing on my chest that I am drowning in it. all these bad memories and tries and failures and trying and […]

hello hormones

this is for us, who has never been loved back, who are always the ones being left behind, who would carry hopes and beliefs and burdens, who wants simple things that would never appear eventually.     sometimes I have extremely low self esteem. You don’t have to remind me of that. I know you […]