yesterday during dinner, sam casually mentioned something which made me pretty pissed off.

not cause it came from him.
but because it came from many other people.

everyone says,

rong is so fortunate.
she can go traveling so many times.

please be reminded that,
when you guys were enjoying by slacking at home,
holding hand and hang out with your darlings,
playing games till god-knows-what-hour,
chionging project with your friends at school,

please be reminded that i was working all the while.

please be reminded that i’m not obligated to pay always first for presents and not get money back till i ask for it.

i’m doing alot of things because i love all of you and feel that since i’m able to do it first, i don’t mind doing it.

and when you guys were chionging for all your project,
please remember that i had already too gone through that time and craziness,
what’s more it was the period when you couldn’t even ask ANYONE for help.

i am not extremely fortunate in your sense.
i work for what i enjoy.
i work and pay with my own money and sweat.

yes,
i am fortunate cause my working hours are more flexible and thus i seem more slack.

if you have no idea how my work goes about,
let me tell you this.

you all have no idea how many times i’ve typed till my wrists and fingers hurt.

you don’t know how much pain and verbal or physical abuse i had to go through.
you don’t understand how much I need to get away from this fucking surrounding which demands very much from me.

if you don’t understand,
and can’t bring yourself to respect

do the least of at least shutting up with those words.

just fuck off and realize how fortunate you guys are to be slacking at home and COMPLAINING not being able to find a job and are broke.

cause it sounds fucking sarcastic.

too bad I don’t neither boyfriend or girlfriend to feed.

and stop saying how much money I waste.

and
you.

i have no idea what you told ks but.

SOMETHING HAPPENED AND IT PISSED ME OFF AND IT STILL DOES.
i CANNOT pretend that nothing happened.