the people out there have no idea.
how much.
how many.
of my brain cells which died recently.

the beliefs i held on tight, so tight.
they left me.
they proved me wrong.
one after another.

I felt…..
Betrayed by the beliefs i held.

Leave me alone.
I shall escape to a lonely island and live there.
or should I just die off.
and remain in that state forever and ever.

nothing’s worth me staying around for.

cuz everything would juz turn into nothing in the very end.

i put on a mask.
i hide behind it.
behind the smiles and laugther and loud voices.
behind the pumping music and greentea with martel.
behind the facade i’ve built for myself.

i believed someone would appear to save me.
im an idiot.
im a fool.
to believe in it.

you proved me wrong.
you all proved me all wrong.

im juz a fucking failure.
leave me alone to die off.